Hopelessly Devoted
by TwistedFire
Summary: A wild idea came to me the other day, and of course I had to drag our favorite Bohemians into the mix. Rated for language.
1. Hopelessly Devoted to Random Profanity

**A/N:** So, I've decided to try my hand at something less-angsty than usual. To be honest, I wasn't originally going to post this, but Sam read it and loved it, so I took her advice and posted it here.

This was inspired by grey-eyed-goddess's fic Banging, so if you're ever in the Wicked section, you should check it out.

Once again, kudos to Sam the Beta.

One more thing: I curse a lot. There is excessive profanity in the first chapter, but I'll tone it down a bit for the other chapters. I promise.

**Disclaimer:** Well I'm pretty sure I'm not a man, which means I can't be Jonathan Larson.

* * *

"Ass!" I shouted. I slammed my hand down onto the desk. My empty coffee cup fell to the floor. "Fuck."

"Bitch!" Maureen called out from the bathroom.

"Douche!" yelled Roger from the couch.

"Um… shit?" Mark said hesitantly.

"Dick!" chimed in Collins.

"Why are we randomly shouting obscenities?" questioned Joanne as she entered the room.

"My dumbass school screwed up my schedule," I mumbled. "They forgot to add an art class and they put me in Driver's Ed again!" I once again slammed my hand down onto my desk. This time, my plate of cold noodles slid off and spilled its contents on the floor. "Shit!"

"I don't see what's so bad with Driver's Ed. I mean, it's not like you actually _do_ anything." Maureen made her presence in the room known. We all glanced to where she was standing—dripping wet, might I add—in the doorway.

"Maureen, you're making a wet spot on the floor. Whatever happened to drying yourself off after a bath? Now I'm gonna have to dry my floor."

Maureen grinned, but said nothing.

I continued. "Besides, I already took Driver's Ed. _last_ year. We only need to take it sophomore year to graduate. By assigning me Driver's Ed. again, they're taking my art class away, which is something I actually _signed up_ for." I bent down to clean up my noodles. "I freaking _love_ art, so now I have to call the school and tell them how badly they screwed my schedule so they'll actually give me an art class."

"Well then, problem solved," pointed out Collins from his position on the floor.

"No, _not _problem solved. Last year when they screwed up my schedule, my parents tried to call the school, but the counselor was never in her office. That means she isn't going to be in her office this year, which means I'm going to have to deal with a wonky schedule!"

"Wonky?" Mark asked.

"Yes, wonky. I like that word. Is there a problem?" I snapped.

Hearing no answer from Mark, I turned away from my computer to glare at him. He was staring at the floor. I giggled.

"What?" Mark looked at me, a slight blush creeping up his cheeks.

"Nothing," I waved it off. "You're just so cute when you're flustered."

His cheeks flushed a deep red and he stared at the floor again.

"What other classes have they given you this year?" asked Roger. He took a puff of his cigarette and exhaled slowly.

"Could you not do that in here? I'd like to _not_ get lung cancer, if that's alright with you." Roger made no effort to put his cigarette out.

I turned back to the desk and grabbed my schedule. "Well according to this, I've got Phys. Ed." I gagged, "with _Mrs. Fry_?! Oh, come on! I had her last year!" I heard Collins on the floor, trying to suppress a laugh. "Ugh. Mrs. Mariani is so much better. At least I've got her for Health." I scanned my schedule again. "Well, I have two different Study Halls, Physics, Advanced Mathematics, A.P. History of the US, Honors English, and Psychology." I sighed. "It's gonna be a tough year."

_Silence._ I turned my attention back to the computer and began typing.

"_There is no future, there is no past,"_ the TV sang.

"How many times have you seen this?" Joanne asked. I grinned.

"Well, it's August now, and I got _my_ copy in April. So far, I've watched it every day since, and the first two weeks or so that I had it, I watched it a few times a day on the weekend. I'd say… at least more than a hundred times."

"You're hopeless," Collins mumbled. I grinned again.

"I believe the term is 'Hopelessly Devoted.'"

Maureen giggled and began to sing, "_Hopelessly devoted to youuuu!"_

Mark smirked and Joanne rested her face in her palms. "It's gonna be a long day," she mumbled.

* * *

**So, please R&R. Let me know if I should continue with this. I'd love to hear what you think.**

**Twisted**


	2. Super Sammy of the Shire

**A/N:** PhotoFiltre can be addicting. Seriously.

I decided to focus on Benny in this chapter, because I can't help but feel sorry for him. I mean, everyone writes him to be this huge jerk that would sell out for a Klondike bar, but if he was such a huge jerk, why were Mark, Roger, and Collins living with him in the first place? They only treat him like a jerk because they're bitter about the Tent City issue.

But I digress.

This chappie goes out to Sam the Beta (or Super Sammy of the Shire, as I like to call her). Hence, the title.

**Disclaimer: **Let's use Exclamation Points of Doom on this one: I don't own Rent!!

-ahem-

* * *

"What are you doing?"

I moved closer to the monitor. "PhotoFiltre."

Benny paused. "Why?"

I sighed and turned away. "I'm bored and Super Sammy of the Shire isn't on AIM."

Benny looked confused.

"My beta, Sam," I clarified. Benny nodded. I turned back to the computer and attempted to edit the photo I was working on.

"Who's that?"

"Kristin Chenoweth," I answered. I shifted in my seat and my hand jerked. The line I was drawing smeared and I grunted.

"Oh." Benny was quiet again. I turned my head to see that he was staring at the picture.

"Oh, by all means, ogle all you want."

Benny's face grew darker and he looked away quickly.

I sighed and closed the program. I sat staring at my computer screen for about a minute before letting my head drop to hit the keyboard with a _bang_. Benny looked mildly amused. "Why don't you write something?"

I lifted my head slightly before letting it drop onto the keyboard again. "What's there to write? I'm bored, not depressed. I always do my best writing when I'm depressed. I have no motivation."

Benny looked wistful. "Well, you could write something about me…"

I straightened again, looking at him.

"I mean, nobody really writes about me, and when they do, they always make me seem like a jerk. I'd like it if someone wrote something _nice_ for once, you know?"

I nodded. "As much as I'd love to, Benny, I'm afraid my muse isn't on my side at the moment." Benny's face fell. I sighed. _Poor Benny._

Benny fell silent again, watching the television. I turned back to my computer and maximized the AIM window. _Nope, still no Sam._ I growled as an IM popped up. Benny glanced back from the TV to give me a questioning look. After about a minute of fevered typing, I closed the IM window and set my Away Message.

"What was that all about?"

"Nothing. Carrie wanted me to go to the mall with her."

"Why don't you go? I mean, you _are_ bored, after all."

"I don't really like going to the mall when it's just Carrie and I. I mean, she's my friend and all, but all she ever does is sit in the arcade and talk to the guy who works there. Honestly, I'd rather be bored in my own home. Besides, I'm feeling very antisocial."

Benny nodded and shifted in his seat. Light from the window bounced off of his bald head and I was temporarily blinded. My eyes watered and I chuckled. "Y'know, Benny, if you want to get on the computer, you can just ask. Maybe you could try your hand at writing your very own fanfiction."

His face brightened as I opened up a Word Document and moved aside to give him space at the computer. After a few moments, Benny began to type. He was slow; using the hunt-and-peck technique to type. After a moment, he paused and deleted what he had typed, only to start over again. I sighed and went downstairs to make a sandwich.

When I came back a few minutes later, Benny was still sitting at the computer, but his typing had stopped. I walked up behind his chair and glanced at the computer to read over his fic. There were no words.

"Uhm, Benny? You need words to write a story."

Benny looked up at me, then back to the computer, then back to me again. "I didn't realize how hard it was to write a story."

I laughed as he closed the program. _You have no idea._

* * *

**Reviews are the cure for all diseases, and I'd really like to not get sick -hinthint-**

**Twisted**


	3. The Disease that is Boredom

**A/N:** I'm having fun writing this. I really am. It's a good way for me to vent, it's creative, _and_ it lets my readers know a little more about me. I mean, it's a win-win situation!

My beta-thanks for this chapter will be done in the form of evil laughter. Muahahahaha! Bwahaha! -ahem-

**Disclaimer:** Do I even need to put a disclaimer? I mean, Rent so obviously belongs to Jonathan Larson, and if I were him, I know for sure I wouldn't need to post my fics on the internet.

Let's get this story moving!

* * *

"I'm bored."

"Becky, we've already talked about this. If you're bored, _write something._ It's really not that hard."

"But I don't _want_ to! I want to go outside! I want to hang out with my friends!" I whined.

"Well then, why don't you?" Mimi asked.

"I would have to take a shower. I don't want to take a shower right now. Besides, my pajamas are _really _comfy."

"You _already _took a shower," Mimi reminded me.

"Yeah, _last night_. Today's a new day." I grabbed a penny and flipped it into the air. It landed in the trash.

Mark chimed in. "What do you normally do when you're bored."

I thought for a moment before replying. "I dunno. I usually read fanfiction, but I'm not in the mood to read right now. Sometimes I gather up papers and shit and set them on fire. I _really_ like fire." I smirked evilly. Mark looked scared.

There was an awkward silence until Mimi cut in. "…oh. Well you could just… talk to us."

"I already am. Besides, you're just in my head. If I do too much talking to you, people will start to think I'm insane."

"How are we only in your head?" Mark looked surprised.

"Well, you _are_ fictional characters. You're just figments of my imagination."

"That's not true! We-," Mimi was cut off when my mom walked into the room.

"Who are you talking to?"

"I was on the phone with Haley."

"Oh." She left.

_Pause._

"Does that prove my point?" I looked at the two expectantly.

Mimi looked stunned. Mark looked like he was about to cry. After another long pause, Mimi spoke. "So, how about watching a movie?"

"Hmm, I didn't think about that. Thanks, Mimi."

"No problem."

The DVD player _whirred_ as I put in the movie. As I sat back to watch the opening credits, I heard Mark mumble something that sounded like, "Fictional characters." I sighed.

_Don't worry, Marky. You're real enough for me._

* * *

**R&R please? Kthanksbai.**

**Twisted**


	4. ADD, Wicked, and Ice Cubes, Oh My!

**A/N:** I'm going to act like I'm on tv and give a shout-out to broadwaybaby4205, because she's like, the perfect reviewer. Seriously. So, to broadwaybaby4205, go you!

I'm giving my beta 'mad props' for helping me out with this chapter. No, I have no idea what 'mad props' means, but I think it's a good thing, so I'm using it... because I'm gangster like that.

-dorky smile-

**Disclaimer:** The disclaimer for today shall be told in story form! Oh boy!

Once upon a time, there was a girl who loved Rent. She loved it so much, she deluded herself into believing that she created it, but then Jonathan Larson came down from the heavens and bitch-slapped her into next week. She never made the mistake of believing she owned Rent ever again. The end.

Wasn't that fun? On with the next chapter!

* * *

"Yes!" I shouted. "The last day of work is finally over! No more dealing with assholes! Woo!" I did a little dance that made me look like a dork, but I didn't care.

"What was your job?" Collins asked.

"I swept floors, washed windows and tables, and mopped," I deadpanned.

Collins cracked up laughing. I took a seat at the computer and waited him to finally catch his breath. It took a couple minutes for him to calm down. "It sounds pretty boring," he finally managed to choke out. I sucked in a big breath of air and let it all out with a _whoosh_.

"Yeah, it was. It gave me time to get really A.D.D. though."

Collins looked confused. "I came up with a lot of song parodies in my head," I elaborated.

"Really? Let's hear 'em." He settled back in the chair and took a sip of vodka.

I sang a verse of my parody of 'Light My Candle'.

"_Have you been to Chocolate World? That's where I work—I clean._

_Yes! You used to sweep the floors._

_It's a living._

_I didn't recognize you without the broomstick."_

Collins choked on his vodka while trying to contain his laughter.

"I'm completely serious, Collins. You don't realize how bored I was." I swiveled my chair to face the computer. There was momentary silence.

"Any more?" Collins finally asked. I sighed and swiveled again to face him.

"Yeah. Today while I was sweeping I came up with a parody verse to 'Without You'." I sang:

"_With chemical burns,_

_The skin aches,_

_The acid smells,_

_The tears fall._

_With chemical burns,_

_The mouth cries,_

_The skin reddens,_

_Bandages are needed._

_Bad stuff happens,_

_It really, really sucks,_

_It takes forever to heal,_

_With chemical burns."_

It was silent. I glanced at the window to see some creature flutter by. My chair squeaked.

"Where the hell did the inspiration for _that_ one come from?"

I grinned. "Well, today I was washing the glass on the doors and I was thinking about how I would probably die from the chemicals, and then that made me think about this morning."

Collins paused. "What happened this morning?"

"Well," I hesitated, thinking back. "A certain _someone_—who will remain nameless—told me that if you put salt on an ice cube and held it to your skin, it would tingle. Now, of course, with me being the perfect little scientist that I am and whatnot, I had to try out this theory for myself." I cleared my throat and grimaced. "It worked," I held out my hand to him to show the angry red mark the ice had left. "There was a lot more than tingling going on," I concluded. Collins shook his head.

I pulled my arm back and cleared my throat so I could use my 'announcer voice' as I turned to the readers. "Warning: Do not try this at home. This stunt has been performed by a professional who has no concern for her safety or well-being whatsoever. Only complete idiots would ever try this." Satisfied, I turned back to Collins.

He blinked once. Twice. Three times. Standing up, he muttered something about needing a joint. I swiveled my chair again as he half-ran out of the room.

_Maybe I'm brainless, maybe I'm wise, but I'm never going to be doing _that_ with ice cubes and salt again. _I shuddered before rubbing the red spot on my hand. _Mental note: Never listen to anything Maureen says ever, ever again._

Joanne entered the room a few minutes later. I ignored her and continued to type. She cleared her throat. I held up a finger and finished the paragraph I was working on.

"Yes?" I asked, spinning my chair to face her.

"Angel, Maureen, and I want to go outside for a bit. Would you like to come too?"

"Sure!" I jumped up excitedly. "Look out, look out, wherever you are! The Beckster is hyper as hell!" I ran out of the room ahead of Joanne and skipped down the stairs, yelling incoherent things the whole way.

When I finally got outside, I saw Maureen and Angel. I squealed and ran to them. "Oh teh noes! The Chicken Fingers from Mars are attacking! Everybody, run for your lives!" I shouted. I then proceeded to run around in circles stupidly while giggling like a drunken person.

Maureen decided to join in on my little escapade and began to shout incoherently and run around in circles as well. We both ran smack into each other and fell to the ground, laughing obnoxiously. After we had finally managed to catch our breaths, we both got back up and began to run again, though this time not in circles.

Angel looked amused. Mark looked terrified, but seemed determined to catch this fiasco on film, nonetheless. Joanne looked like she didn't know what to do. Maureen and I looked like idiots who had escaped from a mental facility. It was all rather entertaining.

"Maybe you two should calm down before you hurt yourselves," Angel called to us.

I glanced behind me to reply to Angel, but Maureen ran straight into me and knocked both of us down again. I wasn't injured because of the adrenaline flowing through my veins. Maureen, however, was not so lucky. "Ow!" she cried. She rubbed at her elbow. "Damn funny bone."

"Of course," I heard Joanne mutter. I got up and dusted myself off.

"That was fun!" I exclaimed as I ran to the patio to sit with the others. Angel laughed.

"If this is how you act when you're hyper, I wonder how you act when you're high."

I was thrown into a fit of giggles. "I am high, silly! I'm high on life!"

Joanne sighed. Maureen hiccupped. My nose tingled and I rubbed it before I could sneeze. The tingle went away, but then my eye twitched. I rubbed it. It twitched again. I blinked. Maureen hiccupped again, and I handed her a soda. She proceeded to gulp it down.

"Great. Now she's going to be even _more_ hyper." Joanne groaned. I walked over to her.

"Just relax, Joanne. Stop worrying. Have _fun._" She looked at me incredulously.

"And how, exactly, do you expect me to do _that_?"

I grinned. "Just find Collins' pot stash, of course." Maureen laughed so hard, soda came out of her nose.

_Just wait and see, Joanne. Wait and see._

* * *

**Ok, raise your hand if you recognized 'As Long As You're Mine' from Wicked. -looks around expectantly-**

**Bwahaha. I'd love to see what Joanne is like when she's high. That would be like... a dream come true.**

**R&R as always please. I'll love you forever.**

**Twisted**


	5. Roger and the Chipmunk

**A/N:** Gah. I'm sorry I haven't updated in like, a week. So much has happened since my last update. I got my wisdom teeth removed (not fun). I've been staying at a friend's house all week, and I've been pretty busy. I went to a birthday party today, I'm going to another party tomorrow _and_ a doctor's appointment, then Sunday I'm doing a bit of last-minute school shopping, and Monday, school starts. Next Saturday, I've got a birthday party, and on Sunday, I'm going with some friends to meet some people (about half an hour away from here).

I'm a busy bee.

Anyways, about my oral surgery: When I was writing this, my face was swollen beyond belief. I looked like a chipmunk. I really did... and then I got a little bored, so I painted my face like a chipmunk's.

Ahem. Sammy rules.

**Disclaimer:** No, you silly readers, RENT _doesn't_ belong to me.

* * *

The room was abnormally silent. I stared at Roger. He stared back. I blinked.

"Wow. I really don't hang out with you much, do I Roger?" I finally broke the silence. He shook his head and continued to stare at me. I was starting to get weirded out.

Another minute of silence passed.

"Y'know, Roger, you're really awkward to be around."

Still, Roger said nothing. I finally snapped. "Why aren't you saying anything?! Fucking talk!"

Roger blinked. "Oh, sorry. I was too busy staring at your face."

I scowled. "What the hell is wrong with my face?!"

"Nothing," Roger answered all-too-quickly. I stared him down. This time, he was the one being weirded out. "It's just…" he continued hesitantly, "your face is like… swollen. It makes you look like a chipmunk." I could see he was struggling to hold back a laugh.

"Well, duh! That's what happens when you get your wisdom teeth removed—your jaw swells!" I was pissed, and all of the yelling was making my jaw sore. Roger looked scared.

"I'm sorry, jeeze." Well, at least he was trying to apologize. I sighed.

"Don't worry about it, Roger. I'm just a bit moody because my jaw is so sore I can't eat properly. It's really frustrating." He seemed to calm down a bit. I grinned as a thought came to me, but winced once I felt a sharp pain in my mouth. Roger blinked.

"Ugh. What I wouldn't give for some anesthesia right about now." I grabbed the ice pack and held it to my tender cheek. "Y'know what happened when they put me on anesthesia to do the surgery?" I asked. He shook his head. I continued. "I specifically remember having 'Glitter and Be Gay' stuck in my head. When the nurses were trying to take me to the recovery room, I told one of them that I was 'singing'."

Roger's face contorted into a look of pure amusement, and a small choking sound escaped his mouth. I sent a sideways glance his way.

"You can laugh at my expense this time." Before I even finished what I was saying, he exploded into laughter. I sat back and waited. A minute passed. Roger's face began to turn red. Another minute went by. He finally stopped laughing and was left gasping for breath.

"Y'know, I really didn't think it was that funny."

Roger wiped at his face, where tears of mirth had fallen. "I'm sorry," he finally managed to choke out. "I just never really get a chance to laugh at you without the fear that my 'happy place' is gonna be cut off." I paused before nodding in agreement. That much was true, at least.

It was silent again, but at least it wasn't awkward anymore. I glanced at the computer, but nothing had changed in the past ten minutes. I heard Roger chuckle. I turned the TV to a random channel. Roger chuckled again. I turned to look at him, beginning to question his sanity.

"It's just… hard to get the image of 'Becky the Chipmunk' out of my head," he answered truthfully. I shook my head.

"Get your kicks and giggles while you can, Roger, because if you mention this to _anyone_…" I drifted off while sending an evil glare in his direction. He could fill in the blanks for himself.

Roger's face blanched. I did the best grin I could. _Nobody shall see the truth behind Becky the Chipmunk ever, ever again._

* * *

**Well, it's almost midnight (What's the time? Well, it's gotta be close to midnight!) and I'm tired. The only reason I'm still awake is because I just _had_ to update for you wonderful people.**

**Love me.**

**Twisted**


	6. Late Nights and Loopy People

**A/N:** Oh teh noes! Tomorrow is the first day of school! I'm really busy right now, so I'm not gonna waste my time on a huge author's note like I usually do.

Gah. Death.

Canadians rock! Well, at least the ones I know.

**Disclaimer:** Nope, not mine.

Read grey-eyed-goddess's fic Banging. That's where I got the idea for this. Seriously. You won't be disappointed.

* * *

_Bang!_ My head hit the desk. "Owww…" I groaned. Maureen laughed at me. I was so tired that I didn't even lift my head to glare at her. "Mmpsstffffth…" I moaned.

"What?" Maureen asked. I could still hear the amusement in her voice.

I lifted my head. "I'm so tired. I don't know if I can make it the whole way through Rent." I leaned back in my chair and closed my eyes.

"No!" Maureen yelled. I jerked and fell out of my seat and onto the floor.

"Hello, floor," I muttered. "How are you today? You're very comfy…" I curled up on the floor and sighed.

"You can't fall asleep!" Maureen shouted at me. I grunted and turned to face her.

"And why not?!" I challenged. "I've seen it at least a hundred and fifty times. I know how it ends—I've got the entire thing memorized. I'm tired and I want to go to bed!"

"But you watch it every day! It's tradition! You can't just turn it off when it's so close to the end!" Maureen whined. I glowered at her and she pouted.

"Maureen, we're only at 'Without You'. There's at least another twenty minutes yet." I sat up. "Besides, I don't want to see Angel's funeral again. It's too sad and I'm too tired to deal with emotion at the moment."

Maureen groaned, frustrated. She continued to pout, but now she was pulling the 'puppy dog eyes' trick. I sighed, resigned. "Okay, fine. I'll stay up until the end of the movie."

Maureen's eyes glimmered and I got off of the floor to sit at the computer. "Goodbye, floor. You were my one and only love, and now we must part," I called to the floor as I blew a wistful kiss. "I'll never forget you." I plopped down onto my chair.

Maureen's face twisted into a frown. "Y'know, you get really weird when you're tired."

I laughed, but it came out more like a screech. "Well, that's what lack of sleep does to me—I get tired, which makes me loopy, which in turn makes me act like a lunatic." To prove my point, I spun my chair and laughed maniacally. Maureen stood, grabbed my chair, and tipped it until I was once again dumped onto the ground.

"You're missing the rest of the movie," she reminded me. I grabbed a bean-bag chair and snuggled into it.

"I guess you're right. I mean, it _is_ almost over. There isn't really a point in turning it off so close to the end." I cuddled closer to my bean-bag as Maureen took the empty chair for herself. "Besides," I continued, "I'm now with two of my loves—the comfy floor, _and_ Rent. I should be happy."

I turned my attention back to the TV. Maureen giggled. "You're such a dork," she told me. I ignored her. _You just now figured this out, didn't you?_

"_Your eyes, as we said our goodbyes—can't get them out of my mind, and I find I can't hide from your eyes," _sang the TV. I heard a sniffle from behind me. I turned to look at Maureen. Tears were streaming down her face.

"What… the… hell?!"

"What?" Maureen tried wiping the tears away. I continued to stare at her. "It's just… so… sad! I mean, Mimi's dying!"

"Maureen, you _do_ know that Mimi's in the next room, right?"

She nodded.

I rolled my eyes. _I knew I shouldn't have stayed up to watch this with Maureen. She always gets so emotional._

I heard more sniffling from behind me. Sighing, I turned back to Maureen. "Come here," I told her as I sat up. She sat down next to me and I hugged her. We both glanced back to watch the movie. Mimi had just been revived and everyone started to sing. Maureen glanced back to me, her face dry once again.

"Can we just… not tell Mimi about this? Please?" Maureen begged me. I groaned. _Hello, palm. Meet face._

* * *

**Time for me to go shopping! Weeeeee!**

**-ahem-**

**Twisted**


	7. Hyperness and the Joys of Cuddling!

**A/N:** I get really loopy when I'm hyper. Like, seriously.

So I've decided that I _loathe_ AP History, but Psychology is actually turning out to be pretty fun. Today, we did one of those personality test thingies, and I turned out to be 'Concrete Random'. Seriously. There were four categories, and out of all of them, I'm 'Concrete Random'. It's official: Psychology and I were meant to be.

Super Sammy is super special.

**Disclaimer:** When will you learn that I don't own it?!

* * *

"Markyyyyyy!" I shouted as I pounced on Mark. He wasn't prepared to catch me and we both toppled over, landing atop of Maureen. She squealed and tried to squirm out from underneath us, but failed miserably. I hugged Mark tightly. "Marky, I missed you! You're so cuddly!" I snuggled closer to Mark. He sent a pleading look in Joanne's direction. She snorted.

"Don't look at me. I can't control this girl."

Maureen shrieked and pushed us off of her. I clutched Mark tighter. "What the hell is going on?!" he shouted while trying to pry me off of him. I didn't budge. I heard him groan.

"I wuv you, Marky," I sighed. "You're like a giant teddy bear." I curled my legs underneath me and buried my head in his chest. I heard Joanne and Maureen laughing behind my back.

"She's been like this all morning," Joanne finally explained.

Maureen laughed. "We've both been up since four in the morning. Neither of us could sleep." She sat back and grabbed a cup of coffee. "We made some coffee to drink, and ever since, she's been a bit…" Maureen searched for the right words. "I guess you would call her 'loopy' right now," she finished.

I suddenly jumped up. "I'm not just loopy; I'm hyper! I'm super duper hyper! Weeee!" I hopped up and down. Mark took this opportunity to scramble away from me. I pouted. "I never get to hang out with you, Marky!" He continued to scramble backwards until he hit the wall. He realized he was cornered and I grinned as he cowered. "You're mine now!" I shouted, and pounced on him again. He grunted.

"Joanne, Maureen, help me!" he pleaded. Joanne sent a sympathetic look towards him.

"I would, Mark, but that would mean she would start trying to cuddle with _us_ again."

Maureen laughed. "Besides, this is too funny when it isn't me!" Joanne elbowed her but she just snorted in response.

Mark squirmed beneath me and continued to try to wriggle his way out of my arms. "Well, is there any way we could get her to stop crushing me to death?!" Maureen shrugged and Joanne shook her head. I giggled.

"Food, sillies!" I snuggled closer to Mark. "Get me food. I'm caffeine sensitive; food will take the edge off of the caffeine and I'll start to act normal again." Maureen and Joanne blinked and stared at me in disbelief. I giggled again. "I'm having completely coherent thoughts; I'm just not acting on them. The caffeine makes me act all shaky and hyper! It's more fun than acting rationally!"

Mark stopped struggling. "What food will make you stop smothering me?" he asked timidly. I thought for a moment.

"Frosted Flakes," I answered. "They're grrrrrrrrreat!"

Joanne disappeared—I assumed to go downstairs and get me a bowl of cereal. She came back about a minute later, empty-handed. "Becky, hun, you don't have any Frosted Flakes in your house." Mark groaned loudly and _thumped_ his head against the wall.

I nodded. "I know. Someone is gonna have to go to the store to get them for me." This time, Maureen was the one to groan. "Don't worry; the grocery store is just down the street!" I declared optimistically. Joanne sighed and once again left the room, only this time, her destination was the grocery store.

Fifteen minutes passed, in which I had removed myself from around Mark (he had started to turn blue from lack of oxygen). A short chase between Maureen and I had occurred, but it ended quickly when I had jumped and landed on Maureen's back. She grunted into the carpet as I attached myself to her back. Joanne finally re-entered the room, carrying a bowl of Frosted Flakes. I perked up as soon as I heard the door close.

"Frosted Flakes!" I shouted as I dove for the bowl. Joanne did her best to duck out of the way while not spilling any of the beloved cereal. I grabbed the bowl and devoured the whole of it within thirty seconds. As I finally finished off the last of the sugar-flavored milk, I lifted my head from the bowl. Mark, Maureen, and Joanne were staring at me in awe, their eyes wide and mouths open. I smiled at them as I made my way to the desk to turn on the computer.

"Wait… so that's it?" Maureen questioned. I turned back to her and smirked.

"That's it, _for now_," I answered her, "but you don't realize that I just ate a cereal _completely coated_ in sugar." Mark gulped and turned considerably paler (if that was even possible), and Joanne looked like she was about to collapse. I bounced up and down in my chair and turned back to the computer. "Get ready for the sugar rush!"

* * *

**So right now, I'm feeling uberly bad for these fictional characters. (I totally made uberly up. Sue me.)**

**Y'know what? Dumping a pack of Tic Tacs into my water makes the water all minty!**

**-ahem- Review please!**

**Twisted**


	8. Study Hall is Complete and Utter Failure

**A/N:** So I'm getting pretty pissed off at my computer, because at one point when I was typing this, some Microsoft C+ thing came up saying there was an error. The thing is, it asks if you want to debug, but if you click debug, it says _"Debug assertion failed!"_ and it pretty much freezes my comp. The only way to make it work again is to quit the program, which means that I basically typed all of this up for nothing. I had to completely re-type it.

Gah. Right. I've been pretty busy with school (even though it's only the first week), so I actually have no idea when I'll be updating next. Like, I never have time to write anymore. I have so much shit to do after school, and I'm actually busier this weekend than I have been during school, so I don't know when I'll be able to just sit back and write. I apologize ahead of time.

I love Super Sammy. She's awesome.

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I live in reality, and because reality hates me, I don't own Rent. Fail.

* * *

"_Hey there, chica."_

"_Mimi? What the hell are you doing in my head?!"_

"_I just thought you'd like a little company."_

"_I don't need company; I need something to do! Damn study hall..." _I scowled.

"_Why don't you write something?"_

"_I have no inspiration! It's a fucking study hall!"_

"_Well, that's why we're here—to inspire you."_

"_Wait, we?" _I heard a giggle. Groaning, I plopped my head onto the desk. Everyone stared at me. "Uhh… math homework," I said. They looked away.

"_Great, just great. You fucking brought Maureen too?" _Another giggle. I resisted the urge to stab myself with a pen. Maureen finally spoke up.

"_Well, geeze. I thought you'd be happy for the distraction. We just wanted to do something nice."_

I nearly sighed, but caught myself._ "I guess you're right. I'm sorry."_

_Silence. _Somehow, I found the silence more annoying than Maureen's antics at the moment. I picked up my birdie pen and began to write feverishly.

"_What'cha writing?" _Mimi asked. I smirked.

"_Fail."_

"_Fail?"_

"_Fail. I'm writing about the School of Fail within the World of Fail."_

"_Wow. That's a lot of fail," _Maureen exclaimed. I knew she was bordering on more giggles and flinched at the thought. I didn't need _that_ in my head.

"_Yes. It's a lot of fail because everything fails."_

"…_so is the glass half-full or half-empty, then?"_

"_It's a glass of fail."_

"_I see…" _was the only response.

"_So…" _Maureen searched for a new topic. _"What classes do you have next?"_

I brightened up. _"Psychology. I love that class! It's really cool!" _I grinned stupidly and didn't even care if the other students thought I was insane. _"I've got lunch after that."_

_Silence_ again. It was still fairly awkward.

"_Hey, Mimi," _I heard Maureen say. _"Did you ever wonder if we could control Becky's body since we're in her head?"_

Mimi laughed. _"That would be pretty cool. I don't think it's a good idea right now, though. She's still in school."_

"_Why not? It would be fun!"_

I began to panic. _"Maureen, don't you dare try to--" _Too late. I felt my leg twitch before my knee slammed into my desk. I had to bite my lip to keep from crying out. My arm was the next to give in to Maureen's control: It shot out in front of me and connected with my books, which went tumbling to the floor. I shrieked as my leg kicked my desk again. It wobbled dangerously. Once again, everyone in the room was staring at me. I glanced at the teacher. She did _not_ look amused.

"There was a spider…" _Weak explanation? Yes. Do I care? No._

"_Maureen, what the hell?!" _I heard giggling. _"You can't do this while I'm in school!"_

Mimi spoke. _"Don't worry, I'll keep an eye on her from now on."_

"_Good." _I breathed a sigh of relief. _"One question: Maureen, how the hell did you do that anyway?" _She laughed.

"_I didn't. After all, I'm just a figment of your imagination. That was all you."_

This time, I didn't even try to suppress my groan as my face met my palm. _Damn spasticness._

* * *

**Uber-spasticness! -ahem- That is all.**

**Twisted**


	9. Anarchy Saves the Day!

**A/N: **I dunno if this one is as funny as the others. I was mildly pissed off when I wrote it, so I think it shows.

The good news is: I actually passed this time! Go me!

Sammy, you may have an easy job, but I luuurrve you anyway!

**Disclaimer:** Cna you raed tihs? I dn'ot own RNET. I raelly dn'ot. Skucs, I konw.

* * *

"Hey, hun."

I looked up as Angel came into the room. "Hi, Angel…" I muttered. I dropped my head back down onto my folded arms.

"Honey, what's wrong?" I felt her kneel beside me and her hand gently rubbed my back.

I sighed. "I'm disappointed because I failed the permit test."

"Aww, I'm sorry, sweetie. Maybe you can go another time…?"

I groaned. "My dad wants to take me again tomorrow. What if I fail again? I don't want to fail again! I don't wanna go!"

_Silence._ Angel continued to rub my back. I sat up and she sat back on her heels to look up at me. I slowly cracked my neck once. Twice. Then my back. Small _pops_ filled the silence. I heard the door open. Turning, I glanced up at Collins, who was holding a just-opened bottle of vodka.

"Whoa… what's wrong with you?" Collins _plopped_ down onto a chair. It creaked. I sighed again.

"Failed the permit test."

"Oh. Ouch." Collins grimaced and took a swig of vodka.

"Yeah. It wasn't completely my fault though. One of the questions had multiple answers."

"What was it about?" Collins took another long swig of vodka.

"Drinking and driving." Collins choked on his vodka and I had to stifle my laughter as he fought to catch his breath. "They wanted to know what your penalty would be if you got caught. The problem was, each option they gave was in the book except for the correct one. The book lied to me." I scowled. "Damn government."

Collins smacked his hand against his knee. "Damn right! It's always the government's fault. Those damn politicians who spent half their lives in law school and don't know what the real world _is_ screw all of us over!" Collins sloshed some of his vodka on the floor by mistake. "I say: fuck the government! You wanna drive? Fucking drive! You don't need their goddamn permission!" He lifted his bottle of vodka to the ceiling. "_Anarchy! Revolution! Justice screaming for solutions! Forcing changes, risking danger, making noise, and making pleas!" _he sang. I giggled.

"Collins?"

"Yeah?"

"This is why I hang out with you." He grinned. I looked down to see Angel smiling.

"So, you gonna go back again tomorrow?" she asked.

I hesitated for a moment before answering.

"I think I will."

Angel's eyes sparkled and she smiled brightly.

"That's my girl."

Collins cheered, "I'll drink to that!" and chugged half of what was remaining in his bottle.

* * *

**Woo! Anarchy!**

**Luvs.**

**Twisted**


	10. Benny Gets A Friend

**A/N:** So I wrote this a few days ago and just now uploaded it, but I just wanted to say...

I WENT TO SEE SEETHER AND BREAKING BENJAMIN LAST NIGHT! There was a mosh pit of doom! It was fucking awesome!

-ahem- That's it.

I don't even know how to express my appreciation for Sammy. Super Sammy of the Shire. ILikeScarvesAndGuitars. Woo. (Go read her fics!)

**Disclaimer:** I don't freaking own anything! Like, seriously. I don't even own my own mind. I'm not really sure who owns it... it's just kinda... there.

* * *

"Morning," Maureen muttered. I turned to face her. Her hair was tangled and frizzy, and she was rubbing sleep from her eyes. I giggled.

"You mean, _afternoon._" I pointed to the time on the computer. "It's 1:43. You've pretty much slept the day away." Maureen grunted something intelligible. I turned back to the computer. "There's coffee already made downstairs." I heard her feet plod down the stairs. A few minutes passed before I heard her footsteps return, accompanied by the clanking of a spoon against a mug.

"Where is everybody?" Maureen asked after she took a few sips of her coffee.

"Mark, Roger, and Collins went to Beer Zoo to get some alcohol: there's a football game on later tonight. They'll probably take a while though: we don't have and snack foods here. They'll need to stop at the grocery store. Mimi, Joanne, and Angel went shopping. They also said something about movies, so they'll probably be going to Blockbuster to look for some new movies to watch." I glanced at the time again. "They've been gone for about a half an hour."

Maureen groaned. "So everyone left without me?! What the hell am I supposed to do now?!" I shifted in my chair. It creaked.

"Well, you could go hang out with Benny." Maureen grimaced.

"Why the hell would I want to do that? He's a douche bag." _Pause._ "I didn't even know Benny was _here._" I turned to face her.

"I don't know what the fuck your problem is with Benny. He didn't do anything wrong! He decides to marry the woman he loves and you guys treat him like shit! I mean, yes, the Tent City cyber studio issue was a bit jerk-ish of him, but come on! Everybody has their bad moments!" I fumed. Maureen looked startled.

"I guess… I don't know. I'm not really sure why we treated him so badly in the first place… I mean, he _was_ cool in the beginning…" She trailed off.

"Exactly. I feel so bad for Benny because you guys either shun him all of the time or treat him like shit! You're too hard on the poor guy!"

Maureen sighed. "I guess you're right." I grinned in triumph.

"Good. Now go have a conversation with the guy. He's really not as bad as you think." Maureen got up to leave the room but hesitated. I answered the unspoken question. "He's downstairs, listening to my iPod." She nodded and left.

After about twenty minutes of silence, I stood up from the computer and stretched my limbs. _I really need to get out more._

Turning to leave the room, I saw Maureen's half-empty coffee cup sitting on the desk. I grabbed it and went downstairs to find Maureen. _It's quiet: too quiet._ I began to worry about the trouble that Maureen could have gotten herself into. I searched room after room, but she was nowhere to be seen. Finally, I decided to check outside. _Can't hurt._

Opening the door, I saw nothing at first. I hesitantly stepped out onto the porch and looked around. I didn't see anyone, but I did hear faint laughter. Following the sound, I headed around to the back of the house. As soon as I rounded the corner, however, water decided to attack me. I closed my eyes and shielded my face from the spray.

I heard more giggling, and the water stopped. Blinking, I hesitantly lifted my head and looked around. Maureen was doubled-over in laughter, her face turning a deep shade of red. A bucket partially filled with water sat on the ground beside her. Benny stood, holding a hose and looking sheepish while trying not to laugh. Both were soaked to the skin.

"What the hell?!" I yelled. I grabbed my shirt and attempted to squeeze the water out of it. I failed. Miserably.

"W—we were h—having a—water fight!" Maureen managed to say between bouts of laughter. I scowled and gave up on getting the water out of my shirt.

"Sorry," Benny apologized. "I didn't hear you coming." I sighed.

"It's okay, Benny. It's nice to see you two finally getting along." I sent a pointed look to Maureen. She laughed.

"Yeah. It's not good news for you, though!" My face scrunched up in confusion.

"What do you mean?"

I saw Maureen and Benny glance at each other. It seemed as if they were communicating, somehow. _Uh oh. This doesn't seem good._

"Well… now that we're getting along… we've decided…" Maureen apparently wanted to be really cryptic, because I had no idea what they'd decided. It was starting to piss me off.

"Decided what?!"

They glanced at each other again before grinning. "Tag team!" they both shouted as I was once again assaulted by the spray of water. Maureen picked up her bucked and threw what remained of the liquid at me.

_Damn it! I just got dressed! Now I'm going to have to change!_

* * *

**Gah. No good deed goes unpunished.**

**R&R please?**

**Gah! I still can't believe I went to see Seether! Ok. I'm done fangirl-ing now.**

**Twisted**


	11. The Horror of Mistakes

**A/N:** OHMIGAWDIHAVEN'TUPDATEDINLYKE,4EVERRRR!!

Ok. I'm done being weird now.

**_Real_ A/N: **I actually _did_ find a mistake in the second chapter, so yesterday, I went back, fixed it, and re-uploaded the chapter. Seriously.

**Disclaimer: **Hell, I don't even own my mind, much less something as amazing as RENT.

I've said it before and I'll do it again: This was inspired by grey-eyed-goddess's fic, Banging. Go to the Wicked section and read it.

Oh. I love Sammy. The end.

* * *

"OH MY GOD!"

I jumped and smacked my knee against the desk. "What?! What is it?!" I frantically began to search for the cause of Maureen's scream.

"You're writing!"

I blinked. "Huh?"

Maureen squealed and bounded up to me. "You're finally writing! It's been ages!"

Mimi got up from her chair to hug me. "Congrats, chica. It seems like the plot bunnies are biting again."

I grimaced. "Don't joke. Those bunnies bite _hard_." I unconsciously rubbed my shoulder.

Maureen laughed. "Well, at least the Writer's Block is done!"

I sighed. "Yeah, about that… I've actually been trying to write for a while, but I'm never able to develop my ideas correctly." I turned back to the computer dejectedly. "Unfortunately, I haven't been completely cured of the Writer's Block epidemic."

Mimi sighed and Maureen groaned.

"Ugh. I don't know where I'm even going with this chapter!" I whined. "I might as well just give it an abrupt endi—"

…

…

"Wow. That _was_ abrupt," Maureen speculated.

"I try."

"Though… it technically would be considered a false-ending now, wouldn't it?"

I growled and turned back to the computer.

Mimi leaned against the back of my chair. "Well, what are you going to do now?"

"I dunno… I've been reading over my other chapters to see if I can get any ideas, but so far—OH TEH NOES!"

Mimi and Maureen both jolted upright. "What's wrong?" they asked as I began to hyperventilate.

"In the second chapter, I forgot to add a word!" I frantically began to click on random things.

"Way to just announce that to everyone. If they didn't notice before, they probably will now."

I bashed my head against the keyboard. "I can't believe that I forgot a word! I pride myself on my grammar and punctuation, and I forgot a fucking word! Nooooooo!" I bashed my head against the keyboard again and began to hiccup.

I felt Mimi's hand on my shoulder. "Relax, chica. It's not like it's the end of the world. You can just go back and fix it if you have to. Re-upload the chapter or something."

My head sprung up and my hair did some sort of aerial attack on whatever invisible creatures decided to get "all up in it's grill."

"Mimi, I love you!" I jumped up and gave Mimi a crushing hug before returning to the computer to fix the mistake.

"Honey, one more thing."

I turned to face the duo behind me. "Yes?"

Both glanced at each other before turning back to me. Worry was plastered on their faces. "'All up in its grill?' Are you feeling okay?"

For the first time this week, I laughed so hard that my stomach hurt and tears fell from my eyes.

* * *

I dunno when I'll update next. Like, it took me forever to finish this chapter. The only reason I'm even uploading it now is because Sammy sent me a message on MySpace asking for something to beta. Meh.

-Twisted


	12. Quartets on Crack

**A/N:** This spawned from a conversation with one of my best friends. She's -shudder- addicted to Jonas Brothers and Demi Lovato.

But anyways, I sounded like I was on drugs when we were talking, so I wrote _this._

**Disclaimer:** I don't own RENT, Jonas Brothers (thank goodness), or Demi Lovato. Besides, if I did, couldn't that be considered slavery?

-ahem- Have fun, kids.

* * *

_Ding!_ chirped my computer. I clicked on a link and a song began playing. _Ugh. Of course Lissa would send me a Demi Lovato song with the Jonas Brothers._ Maximizing the IM window, I read, _'Listen to the whole thing. I'm forcing you to.'_

_Ugh._

Joanne entered as I turned up the volume on my computer. "I love this song!"

I turned, gaping like a fish. "You do?"

She nodded ecstatically and began to sing along. I raised my eyebrow questioningly. "What?!" she defended. "Demi Lovato isn't that bad. I mean, yes, the Jonas Brothers are kind of annoying, but it's a good song!"

"Whatever." Looking back at the computer, I saw that the AIM window was blinking orange. Re-maximizing the chat, I couldn't help but laugh out loud. _'It's a duet of my 4 favorite people and her voice is amazing.'_

"What so funny?" Joanne came up behind me to read the message. I continued to laugh.

"She just said that it was a duet of four people!" I snorted obnoxiously while trying to catch my breath. Joanne's mouth twisted into a smirk and she chuckled softly.

"Wouldn't four people be considered a quartet?"

"I dunno… I think so…" After a moment, I started to laugh again.

"What is it now?"

"I—I don't—it just made me think of—of milk!" I could barely speak between bouts of laughter.

"Huh?"

I had to wait a moment to control my laughter before I could reply. "Quartets. Like, little tiny milk babies or something."

Joanne laughed. "Wait, what about babies?"

"Like, if two quarts of milk had babies, their babies would be called quartets. There would be little quartets of milk running around."

"Little quartets of babies running around?" Joanne obviously didn't understand me. To be honest, _I_ didn't even understand me at the moment.

"Like… quarts of milk having babies… little baby milk. Imagine a quart of milk wearing lipstick and like, with a wig and a dress on, and then another quart of milk with a moustache and a suit and tie. Then, imagine them hooking up and having little babies of milk, so their babies would be called quartets because they're little quarts of milk."

"Wait, wait, so you'll have four little milks running around, and they'll each be a quart?"

"No, a quartet. They'll be the babies of quarts, so they're called quartets," I explained as though I were speaking to a child.

"So two quarts fall in love and make four baby quarts?"

"Yes, and the baby quarts could be called quartets instead of quarts."

"Oh."

There was a momentary silence, but it was broken by crazed laughter. Guess who it was from? That's right: me.

"Dude," I managed to squeak, "We sound like we're on drugs!" My stomach was starting to hurt and my face was wet from the tears that had escaped my eyes. I reached up to wipe them away and felt the heat of my face. _I probably look like a tomato._

A short second passed before Joanne was also thrown into a fit of giggles.

_Dude, this shit is fucking epic!_

* * *

Oh, I'm changing it up and thanking Sammy _at the end_ of the chapter. What now?!

Uhh... right.

-Twisted


	13. We're Surrounded By Rocks

**A/N:** My friends and I went on a trip to Indian Echo Caverns, which basically spawned _this._ I have pictures and stuff on my MySpace (no, I'm not a MySpace whore), so if you want to see them, go to my 'homepage'. (Yes, I've even got pics of the penis rock.)

Thanks to Sammy. Even though we've both got our blonde moments, we figured shit out. Go us.

**Disclaimer:** I wonder how you say 'I don't own it' in Japanese...

* * *

"Weeeee! I'm riding a spider!"

"Hey, you're in my spot! Move!"

"I was here first!"

"Were not!"

"Children! You can both sit on the giant spider! Geeze." Maureen and Roger both glared at me. I groaned.

"What is it about a playground that makes you two so childish?" Joanne got off the cement wall to stand beside me. Maureen and Roger ignored us, deciding that the spider-bars were lame and that they wanted to go pound on the plastic drum.

I sighed and sat on the wall, followed closely by Joanne. Mark was filming, alternating his camera from the view of the creek to the spectacle that Roger and Maureen were making of themselves. Mimi, seizing the opportunity to have the giant metal spider to herself, was now hanging upside-down on one of its legs. Benny had gone off to pet the goats across from the playground, but got sidetracked into the gift shop. Angel and Collins were swinging on the swing set, trying to see who could go higher.

"Will the 12:15 tour of Indian Echo Caverns please meet by the benches?!" called the tour guide.

"Well, that's us," I muttered to Joanne. Groaning, she got up and set off to find Benny before the tour group left. Looking around, I noticed that Maureen and Roger were already standing by the benches, Mimi was climbing her way off of the spider, and Angel and Collins were ducking underneath the jungle gym to get to the other side. Mark and I finally got off the wall to join them as Joanne and Benny emerged from the gift shop.

"Alright, everyone. My name is Paige and I'll be your guide for today. There will be no eating, drinking, or fooling around in the cavern—" I shot a glare at Maureen and Roger. "—and I ask that you please do not touch any of the rock formations."

The group began walking towards the stairs that led to the cavern entrance. Maureen and Roger were at the front of the group, already firing off questions for the tour guide. Mimi and Benny were close behind them, talking and admiring the view. Joanne and I were in the middle of the group, trying to keep an eye on everyone to make sure that there wouldn't be any trouble. Angel and Collins were behind us, holding hands and receiving rude looks from a mother of four. Mark was in back, filming everyone while trying to keep his camera out of the hands of a child who had become a little _too_ interested in the contraption.

The trek down the stairs was uneventful, and as we reached the bottom, we turned to watch the creek flow. The tour guide droned on about the history of the creek, but none of us were listening. Finally, it was time to go into the cavern. We all filed in slowly as Paige continued to ramble on. Roger and Maureen had somehow managed to sneak to the back of the group.

Entering the room that the guide called "The Indian Ballroom," Mark began to focus his camera on the sparkling rock formations as the rest of us whispered to each other. Turning back, I saw Roger reaching out to touch a rock with Maureen egging him on.

"Roger!" I hissed. He jerked back violently, tripping over Maureen's foot and falling on his ass. Scowling, he got back up, rubbing his backside and glaring at Maureen, who was giggling uncontrollably. In anger, he marched to the middle of the group to stand beside Mimi.

The next few minutes were fairly peaceful as we traveled from room to room. Roger had easily forgotten about the incident with Maureen and was now focused on keeping Mimi warm. Joanne, in an attempt to calm the diva down, was now in the back of the group, holding her hand and snuggling against her. Angel and Collins were looking at a formation on the wall and talking in whispers, Benny was attempting to take pictures of a small underground lake he had found with a camera he bought in the gift shop, and Mark was filming a hole. I sighed, moving back to where Joanne and Maureen stood.

"Hey," I whispered, looking towards the ceiling of the cave, "Doesn't that rock look like a…?"

Glancing up, Joanne grinned. Following suit, Maureen, too, looked up. A loud laugh escaped her lips.

"What is it?" Apparently Maureen's laugh had attracted the remaining bohemians to our huddle in the back of the group.

"That rock up there." Maureen pointed to the ceiling. "It looks like a penis!"

_"Penis! Penis! Penis!"_ echoed through the cave, and I smacked myself in the forehead.

_Wow. Way to be subtle, Maureen._

* * *

I've got an uber-headache of doom. Is it completely necessary to add another Author's Note after this chapter?

Oh well.

-Twisted


	14. Homework is Dangerous! Don't Do It!

**A/N:** This chapter is about the dangers of homework... or technically the dangers of procrastinating, but whatever. I blame homework.

On a different note, guys: I've been seriously considering ending this. I never meant for this to get so long, and though I've been having fun writing this, I think it's about time for this to end. I'm just afraid that if I stop writing chapters for this, I'll stop writing altogether. Hopefully it doesn't turn out to be true (Secretly, I've had an idea for a fic stuck in my head for a couple weeks, so I think I'll start working on it. I have to pitch it to Sammy though, because if she doesn't like it, I won't post it).

I'll need to write a closing chapter in a while, but until then, enjoy this.

**Disclaimer: **-sigh- Why should I bother? I don't own it. Damn.

* * *

"Morning, Becky. No school today?" Angel cheerily skipped into the room.

I didn't reply, choosing to remain face-down in my history book.

"Becky?"

My leg twitched. I felt my head being lifted from the book, and I opened my eyes groggily. They burned painfully, and I knew that they were probably bloodshot. Angel was looking at me, her face full of concern. "Oh, honey, what's wrong?"

I twitched again and mumbled incoherently.

"Honey, are you ok?"

"HOW DID THE TREATY OF PARIS OF 1783 FAIL TO RESOLVE TENSION BETWEEN THE UNITED STATES, ENGLAND, AND SPAIN??" I shouted. My eye twitched and I began to hyperventilate. "HOW DID THE ORDINANCE OF 1784 PROPOSE TO DEAL WITH THE LANDS CEDED TO THE NATIONAL GOVERNMENT??" My throat felt as if it was constricting, and I struggled to breathe. My vision began to blur, and Angel's worried face was lost an arsenal of reds and blues.

"Hon, listen to me, you need to breathe! Calm down!" Angel sounded frightened, but I vaguely didn't care. My head swam and there was a faint ringing in my ears. It felt as if the room was alive and pulsing, and the ground I was lying on was moving in circles.

"Help! Someone, get in here!" I heard hurried footsteps pounding towards me.

"ymx+b! Write an equation for in point-slope form for line A with a slope of 4 and an x-intercept of 13!" Random math problems spewed from my mouth, though not as loudly as before. I had long-since closed my eyes, and I could see strange creatures swimming before them. Hues of green and orange exploded behind my eyelids before warping into a swampy brown color. Formulas and numbers became visible, and suddenly they were chasing me around a white room full of flying words and letters.

"I think she's gone into homework overload!"_ Is that Collins?_ I was chasing reality, but every time I would catch up to it, reality would bitch-slap me and run away again.

"Quick, take the textbooks and hide them!" Angel sounded very in-charge of the whole situation. "Roger, put Rent in. Mark, bring up some Pushing Daisies fanfiction. Mimi, find her iPod. Maureen, find speakers. Play the Wicked soundtrack as loud as you can. Joanne, make coffee." I heard the pounding of feet on the staircase, and even through my homework-induced haze, I appreciated how serious Maureen was being about this.

"Come on, sweetie. We're gonna get you through this." Angel's hand was on my back, rubbing it in soothing circles. I heard her say something to Benny, but by this point, I was too far gone to recognize English anymore.

I heard a garbled mumbling that was becoming louder every moment. Loud, then soft, then louder again. Many voices, then just one, then a few, and many again. High, low, medium, high. The sounds echoed throughout the house, and I strained to understand the strange words. Soon, I began to recognize a familiar beat, and then music, and then language. The voices flooded my mind and the English language came flying at me. The strange sounds were forming coherent words, and I felt a deep rumbling in my throat (humming, I assumed).

"I think it's working!" I heard someone exclaim. I felt movement towards me and something was placed in front of my face. A sweet, bold smell wafted into my nostrils, and I inhaled deeply. Daring to open my eyes, I squinted as bright lights invaded my vision. As they subsided, I swiveled my head. Pictures were moving on my TV, and it took me a few moments to recognize them. Glancing around the room, I saw the concerned bohemians standing over me. A cup of coffee sat on the floor in front of me.

Sitting up and reaching for the steaming liquid, I cleared my throat.

"We almost thought we'd lost you. Luckily, Angel knew what to do and found you in time." Collins knelt, speaking calmly.

"Homework is not the best way to spend a day off." My voice cracked, and I took a sip of coffee.

"Well, for now, just relax. You can finish your homework later. You need a break."

"If I take a break now, I'll probably never get done." Nevertheless, I got up and shuffled to the computer to read the story Mark had brought up.

_Well, I've got quite a story to tell. Hopefully, Mrs. G. will buy it and give me another day._

"Of course, it would have helped if I hadn't waited an entire week to work on this."

I heard a crash and a groan behind me. _Well, Angel's going to have a bruise tomorrow._

* * *

I've got a lizard on my shirt. Yes, random, I know. Your mom.

-Twisted


	15. The Bitter End

**A/N:** This is it, guys. It's finally over. My little baby is all grown up -sobs- and it's moving out of the house -sniffles- and it's starting a family! -breaks down in tears-

-ahem- Now that that's over...

It's a bittersweet end for me.

* * *

"BECKYYYY!!"

I jumped, startled, and hurriedly minimized my computer program. "What?! What is it?! Did the crickets get loose? Where are they?!" I jumped up onto the chair, searching for invisible crickets.

"Nothing's wrong. I'm bored," Maureen huffed.

"…oh." I sat back down in my chair again and opened Internet Explorer.

"What are you doing?"

"N—nothing." I gulped, hoping Maureen didn't notice my nervous stuttering. She did. Narrowing her eyes, she sent a suspicious glare in my direction. I fidgeted.

"You aren't finishing your story, are you?"

"N—no! Don't be silly! I wouldn't do that!"

Maureen stared at me. I stared back.

"Hello, ladies."

I turned my head to say 'hello' to Benny, and Maureen took my distraction as an opportunity to attack. Springing from across the room, she wrestled me (and my chair) away from the computer.

"Benny, maximize that window!" Benny hesitated and I howled as Maureen's knee crushed my thigh.

"No! Don't do it, Benny! It's for your own good!"

Benny seemed split in his decision, but finally, he made for my computer.

"Nooooo!" I shouted, but it was too late. Benny had already maximized the window. I burst into tears. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" I sobbed, sagging against the chair in defeat.

The rumbling of feet erupted from the hallway, and soon the rest of the bohemians had joined us in the room.

"She's writing the closing chapter!" Maureen screamed hysterically. The other bohemians gasped in shock. Angel stepped forward.

"Honey… is this true?" I nodded dejectedly.

"I can't believe you! Are you really so willing to be rid of us?! To—to give up on us?! After all we've been through?"

"Mark, please, let her explain."

I hiccupped and rubbed my neck before answering their questioning stares. "I just—I never really wanted to end it, but I never meant for it to get as long as it did. I want to start—_hic_—I want to start something new. It's just… time for me to move on. I mean, I still want to stay in the fandom, but the longer I put off an ending, the harder it gets to let go."

I could sense anger and fear and disbelief. Benny knelt beside me. "Well, I don't regret it. I've had fun here. Now, me and them," he gestured to the other bohemians, "we're friends again. I have you to thank for that."

Tears leaked from my eyes, and I sniffled.

"I don't regret it either. I would never regret this." Angel smiled softly.

"Neither do I. I've actually… had fun." Joanne grinned as Maureen snuggled against her.

"Me either. You've given me free vodka!" Everyone laughed as Collins raised his glass. Mimi knelt in front of me.

"_There's only us, there's only this—" _she sang.

"_Forget regret or life is yours to miss—" _Joanne and Maureen joined in.

"_No other road—"_ Now Collins and Angel.

"_No other way—" _Benny, Mark, and Roger.

"_No day but today."_ I finally sang along as the song ended.

And now, my friends, it is really, truly over.


End file.
